I must want to do it since I'm hesitating. In that case, I might as well just do it!
I play the short videos I watched again and think carefully about which performances I can do. After that, I wear the clown costume and pick some props before heading to the stage...
[Sara]Hey!
Sara happens to be performing when I'm making my way to the backstage. Unfortunately, I can't see very clearly from where I am, but it's still a novel experience to appreciate her dancing from this distance.
The music stops and Sara bows to the audience. I start clapping with everyone else. As the next melody starts, I suddenly remember that I am intending to perform on stage, so I hurriedly put on the clown mask, pick up my props, and head onto the stage.
[Sara]...Eh?
[Audience A]A clown? This is strange. Is there a clown performance today?
[Audience B]Soul's got another clown? Is it someone new?
When Sara sees me after I come onto the stage, she is obviously taken aback... Actually, I should say she is outright surprised. She's not the only one though, as the whole audience is wondering who this unexpected performer is.
[player](whisper) Sara, it's me.
[Sara](whisper) ...It's you? What are you doing?
[player](whisper) It's too much trouble to explain everything, but I'm basically here to help out.
[player](whisper) Sara, you should get off the stage and get some rest first. I'll entertain the audience during this time until it's time for you to come back up here.
After speaking, I wave at the audience and receive some appreciative applause from them. Sara falls silent for a moment, then she quickly walks to the end of the stage after saluting the audience. Just like that, the stage is mine.
[player](whisper) Phew... Let's do this! (loudly) Yee—ah—haa—!
I imitate the screams of excitement I saw on that video to give myself courage and to signal the beginning of my show, then I take out some colored balls and start juggling.
The only things I've prepared are simple performances like juggling colored balls and catching hoops since I can't handle anything too complicated. I'm not hoping for lots of applause. I'm happy as long as Sara gets to rest for a little longer before she does her next performance.
However, as I start distributing balloons to the audience, something unexpected happens...
[Little girl]Mommy, when will the clown start riding the unicycle?
[Woman]Be patient, dear. Can't you see the unicycle on the stage? The clown will ride it after handing out the balloons.
[Little girl]Wow!
[player]Um...
It's true that riding a unicycle is a traditional clown performance, but it's a little difficult for a novice clown like me.
...While that's true, I can't really say no to the look of expectation on the child's innocent face.
[player]It shouldn't be that different from an ordinary bicycle... right?
With great trepidation, I sit on the unicycle, lower my center of gravity, and try to step on the pedal.
Oh! It's started to move! I should be okay as long as I keep my arms open and maintain my balance! I'll ride a lap slowly like this until Sara or someone else comes onto the stage for the next performance on the program!
[Little girl]Mommy, can't the clown juggle balls while riding the unicycle?
[player]Ahaha... Little girl, can you not be so demanding? Eh?!
Oh no! I got distracted and am about to fall!
Just as I'm about to fall to the ground and make a fool of myself, two hands reach out, clasping my palms and pulling my body up firmly, and start guiding me forward.
[Sara]Ahaha... that looks slightly dangerous.
[player]Y-You saved me... Thanks.
[Sara]Hehe, you're welcome. The music hasn't stopped, so let's continue with our performance.
[Little girl]Look, mommy, the clown is dancing with that lady!
[Audience C]The clown and the dancer dancing together? Speaking of which, Soul indeed used to have this performance!
As the audience said, Sara doesn't just lead me around but also guides me to dance to a funny and light melody.
Dancing with Sara... I never even dreamed of something so amazing!
I'm so elated by this wonderful experience that I stand in a daze on the stage for a while when the music ends before I manage to say goodbye to Sara and the audience and go backstage.
...Hold on.
[Sara]Hmm...
[player]Did Sara manage to rescue me in time because she was paying attention to me when she was behind the stage?
[player]...
I seem to have troubled Sara anyway in the end. I start developing mixed feelings. Did I really manage to help her out?
[Sara]Um, are you leaving already? I haven't thanked you yet.
After enjoying the last performance from behind the stage, I return to the wardrobe to change and am about to leave just as Sara comes in. She is holding two cups of tea, so I find a place to sit down and start chatting with her while sipping the tea.
[Sara]I heard about everything that happened from Ciri. The ticket inspector is feeling much better now after an afternoon of rest.
[player]You're welcome. I just helped out a little. I think I got the better deal because I got to see you perform up close from backstage. It's not easy to get such a special seat.
[player]But... It seems like I did something unnecessary by coming onto the stage. Sorry about that.
[Sara]Why are you suddenly apologizing?
[player]It looked like you would have to do several consecutive performances, so I wanted to give you a break so you can rest. In the end, I had an accident and made you come to my rescue.
[Sara]Oh, you're talking about your guest performance. I still don't understand why you're apologizing though.
[player]Um, was I not clear enough... Well, I wanted to give you some time to rest, but it seemed like you were watching the stage closely because you were worried. That's why you managed to appear in the nick of time and help me. Is that not the case?
[Sara]Haha, I was watching you, but mainly because I wanted to enjoy your performance. I wasn't really worried.
[Sara]Also, since we completed the performance successfully, there's no such thing as an "accident" to the audience. In their mind, everything was planned for theatrical purposes.
[Sara]Not only did I receive your kind and considerate thoughts, but the audience also got a special performance, so I say today is good day. Don't you agree?
[player]...Hahaha, you have a point.
Today is Sara's birthday. As long as she's happy, then it is a good day for her.
[Sara]Here, this is for you.
[player]What's this? A clown mask?
[Sara]I painted this pattern myself. This is a small gift to thank you for helping out today.
Huh? A mask that Sara painted personally? This is a real treasure for a fan like me!
[Sara]Each clown has their own mask. I think this smiling face is more suitable for you. As for the other mask... Let's leave it sitting there quietly until its owner returns.
Recalling what Ciri said and hearing Sara's cryptic tone, I realize that there should be a story behind that mask. I would be lying if I said I wasn't curious, but it wouldn't be polite for an outsider like me to ask too many questions about this, so I better not think too much about it.
[player]It's your birthday today. Instead of giving you a gift, I'm receiving one from you instead. This feels a little strange.
[player]Speaking of which, the work of the troupe is harder than I imagined... The program is so full even though it's your birthday today.
[player]The ticket inspector told me that most of the workers of the troupe are elderly, so this must not be the first time that you have had a shortage of manpower, right?
[Sara]You're right that it isn't the first time, but the climate of One Han City is quite mild, so everyone has become healthier since we came here. In other places, it's quite common for us to need to rest because many members of the troupe are feeling unwell at the same time.
[player]Why doesn't the troupe consider recruiting some younger staff? Oh, don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the senior members of the troupe... but it should be more convenient to have younger people around to do the heavy lifting.
[Sara]We have considered that before, but it's not as easy as it seems.
[Sara]Although Soul is relatively famous, it's now an old troupe that might close down at any time. A place like this isn't that attractive to younger people.
[Sara]What's more, the troupe's current income is only enough for us to maintain the current roster of staff. We're not in a position to recruit more people.
[player]I see, so there really isn't much you can do about that.
[Sara]There are some ways. For example, many people have advised me to replace the older employees with younger ones. They said we might be able to attract other performers to join us if the working environment becomes younger or something.
[player]To most people, this really would be an effective method.
[Sara]Do you also think so?
[player]I agree with that on a rational level, but... humans rarely make decisions purely on their rational judgment.
Unless it's a matter of life and death, it's difficult for people to decisively give up certain things, even though they are clearly "unprofitable"... At least that's what I think right now.
[player]Even if I agree with that, I still wouldn't make such a recommendation because you must have your own considerations as the leader.
[Sara]Being rational or emotional... Hehe, actually, I haven't thought so deeply about it. I just don't think I have the right to do that.
[player]You don't have the right?
[Sara]To me, Soul is a carriage, and we all happened to get on the same carriage by chance.
[Sara]We all made our own decision to get on, so everyone should have the right to decide when their own journey will end. No one else should be able to decide that for them. This is our respect for each other. Even if I'm the leader, I'm really just another passenger.
[player]You have a point... but there should still be something special about being the leader, right?
[Sara]Maybe... Like I'm sitting at the very front of the carriage or have a driving whip in my hand? Hehe...
[Sara]What makes us Soul is that everyone is on this carriage. If this problem can be solved by changing people, wouldn't it be more convenient for me to change the carriage? However, I don't want to get off this carriage yet.
[Sara]But I don't know how long my journey as the leader can go on. Perhaps my own journey will be over before the carriage is forced to stop. After all, like I just said, I'm just one of the passengers.
[Sara]So how can an irresponsible leader like me decide whether our members stay or leave? I can't do anything. I can only dance until the end of the journey and leave everything up to fate.
[Sara]Also... I have my own selfish motives too. After all, not any old troupe can tolerate a person like me who does whatever I want on the stage.
[player]...I think that you're already very responsible. Dancers should focus on dancing. It's more suitable to say that your journey can continue because you're still in love with dancing.
More often than not, it takes a lot of effort to do one's own duties well. And everything else is probably just up to fate as you say.
[Sara]"Dancers should focus on dancing." Thank you, I really like this quote. Somehow, our conversation is getting more and more complicated, so let's talk about something else. How did it feel to perform on a stage for the first time?
[player]To be completely honest with you, I was really nervous. But I relaxed once I got on stage and focused on my performance. I even started to find it fun.
[player]You might not believe this, but when I almost fell off the unicycle, my first thought was: "how can I fall in a way that can make this show better."
[Sara]Oh, to be able to think something like that means you've got a talent for performing.
[player]Haha, thanks for the praise! But what I'm happiest about is that I got to dance with you, Sara. This is an incredible thing for a fan like me.
[player]Since you gave me this mask, you can get me to come back for a guest performance the next time you feel tired. If you don't have enough people to help you, don't hesitate and just tell me. No matter how good the climate is in One Han City, elderly people will feel physically unwell from time to time.
[Sara]...
[player]...W-Why are you suddenly so silent? Did I say something weird?
[Sara]No, but I've never met someone as weird as you who is so proactive about wanting to help out.
[player]There's nothing weird about it. It's because I like watching you dance, Sara.
[Sara]That's it?
[player]Is that reason not good enough? I... I don't know when your journey will end, Sara, how far Soul can travel, or when I'll no longer be able to watch your dancing.
[player]But it's pointless to worry about these things. The only thing I can do is do my best to ensure this carriage can travel a little farther so I can watch more of your performances. You're doing your best in your own way, so I've decided to do what I can to help you.
[Sara]...I understand. Thank you, and please help us again if we need your help suddenly.
[player]You don't need to say "please." That sounds so formal.
[Sara]Hehe, we're going to have dinner to celebrate my birthday a little later. Come and join us.
[player]Woohoo! I get a free birthday meal.
Oh, speaking of it, there's something important I haven't said yet.
[player]Sara.
[Sara]Hmm?
[player]Happy birthday.
[Sara]Oh, that's the best thing I've heard all day.
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